12.17.2009

Another Rough Draft Speech

This was written for Dwayne Carey Hill on the occasion of his being chosen "Employee of the Month" at Rough Draft Studios, way back in the early 2000's:



At the risk of sounding truly excited, let me just say "WOW".


WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW.


Employee of the month, Phew. Let me just take this in...


I'm sorry. Did I forget to say hello to all of you? Well, hello my friends and co-workers. My heart is gladdened by your presence and my mighty drawing hand is indebted to you, for are we all not part of the same whole, striving towards the same goals?


I'll let you know a little secret. I like the fleshy part of a woman's ankle. And why do I say that? Because in choosing your employee of the month, you must look at the person as a whole, the sum of all parts.


And what are the sum of my parts? I'm more than just a cleanly-shaven and neatly dressed man with dashing good looks and a winning smile...I'm Dwayne, dammit. You see the nice teeth. You see the sparkling eyes. You see the firm ass. You see the masterful drawings.


But do you see my ankles? I don't think so. You know what I think? You FEEL my ankles. Not in the vulgar sense of touching, but in the spiritual sense of caressing. Call it what you will, but I stand here...


your Employee of the Month.


And I congratulate not myself, but all of you, for choosing wisely, and not with your minds, but with your hearts.




I love you all.